Red Flags When Talking to Strangers Online (and What to Do)

Skip or report: the two moves you need

Every red flag on this page comes with one of two actions. Knowing them in advance means you don't have to think when a chat turns.

• Skip when someone is rude, pushy or just makes you uneasy, but hasn't clearly broken a rule. On Omlet, press Next or the right arrow key. You won't be matched with that person again for 30 seconds.
• Report when someone breaks the rules: sexual content, harassment, hate, scams, threats, or anyone who seems under 18. Tap the flag on their video, pick a reason and press Report and skip. You move on right away, moderators review it, and you're never matched with that person again on that device.

When you're unsure, skip. You can always report later behavior, but you can't un-hear something you stayed around for. For a full walkthrough of reporting on different platforms, see how to report someone on video chat.

Manipulation red flags: pressure, guilt and flattery

Manipulation rarely looks dramatic. It usually sounds friendly, a little needy, or flattering, and it's designed to make saying no feel rude.

Pressure and urgency

"Quick, before I have to go." "Just do it now, it takes a second." Real conversations don't have deadlines. Urgency is there to stop you from thinking. Action: skip. Report if it's tied to money, codes or sexual requests.

Guilt-tripping

"I thought you were nice." "Wow, so you don't trust me?" "Everyone else does it." Guilt turns your boundary into their hurt feelings, so you'll back down to fix it. You don't have to. Action: skip.

Over-the-top flattery

Intense compliments, "I've never connected with anyone like this," or talk of feelings within minutes. Fast intimacy lowers your guard and is often the warm-up for a request. Action: slow down, and skip if a request follows.

Boundary pushing: when no doesn't stick

The single most reliable warning sign is what happens after you say no. Someone safe accepts it and moves on. Someone who isn't will ask again, bargain or reframe it.

• They ask again after you said no, or try a smaller version: "just for a second," "just once."
• They start small and escalate. A harmless request, then a slightly bigger one, then another. Each yes is used to justify the next ask.
• They want your camera pointed somewhere: lower, around your room, out the window, at your desk or at a document. That's either sexual or a hunt for personal details. Report it.
• They pressure you to turn your camera on when you've chosen text only. Text chat with your camera off is a perfectly normal way to talk.
• They ask you to do something on camera "one more time." That can be a sign they're recording. Read are random video chats recorded? to understand what can and can't be saved.

Moving you off the platform

"This site is glitchy, add me on another app." "Let's go somewhere more private." A quick push to switch apps is one of the most common first steps in scams and harassment, because it takes you away from the report button and moderation.

• Asking for your social handles or phone number in the first few minutes: skip.
• Sending links, QR codes or "verify yourself" sites: report with Spam, ads or scams.
• Asking you to read out a code sent to your phone: report. That's an account takeover attempt, explained in our verification code scam guide.

Swapping contacts with someone you genuinely get along with is your choice to make later. Being rushed into it is the red flag.

Age-related red flags

Omlet is for adults 18 and over. Age is self-declared, so stay alert to these signs and act on them every time.

Chats with someone who says they're under 18 are ended on Omlet, and sexual content involving anyone under 18 means a permanent ban. If you're unsure, report it. Reviewing it is the moderators' job, not yours.

How to tell if someone is a creep online: the quieter signs

Some warning signs build slowly. On their own they might mean nothing. Two or three together are a pattern.

• Very specific personal questions: which neighborhood, which gym, what time you leave work, your full name.
• Secrecy: "Don't tell anyone we talked," or asking whether you're alone.
• Stories that don't add up: their age, job or location changes from one minute to the next.
• Backhanded comments that knock your confidence, followed by warmth, so you work to win their approval.
• Fixation on your body or appearance rather than anything you're saying.
• Their camera is dark or pointed away while they keep asking to see more of you.

Your gut is data. If you feel uneasy and can't say why, that's still a good enough reason to press Next.

Red flag cheat sheet

Thinking about taking a friendship offline? Run through how to safely meet someone from the internet first, because the same warning signs apply with higher stakes.